There are two parts to getting divorced: the emotional process and the legal process. The two processes are separate but inextricably entwined.
The legal process, bound by laws, likes to follow a neat, orderly progression.
The emotional process in stark contrast is a roller-coaster ride with no track. There are no rules and everyone has a different path. There’s no logical progression, there are loopbacks and switchbacks and you never know what’s around the bend.
And that’s where Beyond Divorce by relationship expert, Jeannine Lee comes in. It’s a great guide to keep with you through your divorce journey.
The early sections on emotions alone are worth the investment in the book. I would read through them initially but go back when you find yourself seething with anger following a phone call from your STBX or your attorney or when you’re frantic with worry that you’ll be living under a bridge eating cat food. Read again the section for the particular emotion and work through the suggested activity. This is how you put these ugly emotions to work for you and how you’ll avoid those knee jerk reactions you may later regret.
As hard as it may be to believe it now, there will come a point in time when you have calmed your emotions. You’ll breathe a sigh of relief and maybe even allow yourself to get caught up in the flurry of daily living or dive into the dating pool but wait your journey’s not over yet.
The later sections of Beyond Divorce are about learning why your relationship ended, rediscovering yourself and redesigning your life. Devoting time to these sections is so important, especially if you want to avoid making the same choices again. In these sections, Jeannine shares what she’s learned from coaching many clients over the years and provides numerous helpful and practical suggestions. At the end of each chapter comes an easy self-assessment tool to gauge where you are. If you’re not where you’d like to be, then I’d suggest waiting a few weeks and then revisiting the chapter to reassess. In the interim, Jeannine’s valuable guidance will help you on your way.