Wisdom From Divorce: Children Feel The Pre-Divorce Tension

Divorce doesn’t come as relief only to adults. Children also feel the pre-divorce tension even in marriages where the conflict is not open. It was such a relief because there was so much tension and distance between them. I felt they never should have gotten married but if I had ever said that then the […]

Wisdom From Divorce: Are You Coping With Your Marriage?

Being married is rarely described as being easy. We’re told you have to work at the relationship. But when a marriage is predominantly difficult, “working at it” shifts to coping with your marriage: It was a very difficult marriage and I coped by being pretty closed off. Certainly emotionally closed off but sexually closed off […]

Are You Jealous Of Your Ex Dating Someone Else?

After divorce, seeing your ex with a new partner or date is a pivotal moment. It can stir up lots of emotions and you may even be jealous of your ex dating someone else and be confused by that: He actually started dating someone who was another parent at our school and our children are […]

Wisdom From Divorce: Were You Meant To Be Single?

When some people get divorced it makes them question the whole concept of marriage. It might even have you wondering if you were always meant to be single: I know blended families work for some people but I look at the problems they have and I don’t want to ever deal with that. I feel […]

Wisdom From Divorce: Having The Best Stuff Is Not What’s Important

There’s always less money after divorce. Adjusting to the new reality is not just about cutting back on your spending. It’s about embracing that having the best stuff is not what’ s important in life: Financially, it was very tight but that was OK. What’s more important is authenticity and putting that value on living […]

Wisdom From Divorce: Discovering What Life’s Really About

There are no guarantees in life. We all know that and that ‘s perhaps why sometimes we cling so hard to what we know. Yet, sometimes it’s letting go of everything that leads to discovering what life’s really about: On a good note, I’m now happily in love which I never knew what that felt […]

Wisdom From Divorce: Are You Miserable In Your Marriage?

Nobody expects a marriage to be awesome all the time. We’ve all been told you have to work at your marriage and that there are good times and bad but what happens when you realize you’re miserable in your marriage? The thought of being like my mom and being miserable in a marriage and being […]

Wisdom From Divorce: I Lost Myself In My Marriage

When your marriage is ending or is deeply troubled, don’t be surprised to find yourself thinking, “I lost myself in my marriage.” In my marriage, I had really lost myself. I had lost my confidence and I had allowed myself to believe that I wasn’t capable of many things. So it was almost surprising that […]

Wisdom From Divorce: Was My Marriage A Lie?

When your marriage ends because you discover your spouse has been deceiving you since the very beginning, you ask yourself, “Was my marriage a lie?”: The fact that he was cross-dressing behind my back is, to me, a betrayal on the worst level. It’s like my whole marriage was a lie. I feel honestly, that […]

Wisdom From Divorce: I’m Afraid Of Being Alone

Have you ever asked someone whose marriage is clearly troubled why they stay? Ever heard, “I’m afraid of being alone?” or “I’d rather stay married than be alone?” Coming out of marriage at thirty-six I felt fear and loneliness, the fear that I would never find a match that I would really love, ultimately on […]