Feeling that divorce means failure

Divorce cake

When I asked Antonia Ragozzini what the hardest part about getting divorced was for her, without a moment's hesitation she said, "feeling like a failure." I think that many of us have felt that way and I think too that it's an inevitable conclusion when you go into marriage believing it is a lifelong commitment. While there is no denying that your marriage vows are broken, it's important to … [Continue reading...]

When divorce means no children

No children after divorce | divorce support | Since My Divorce

In the last couple of posts, we've talked about our culture of marriage, the expectation that marriage comes with adulthood. I think there is also the expectation that we will have children and for most of us, that expectation is met by our own desires. Although medical advancements have made it safer for older women to give birth, and the choice to become a single mom is more acceptable today, … [Continue reading...]

Learning to love yourself

Reading Alone

Antonia believes that the culture of marriage within our country was a big reason why she thought she needed to have a man to be complete. That in turn led to a series of poor choices in men. What she came to realize that was that she needed to start by loving herself. Here's how she did that: [contemplate1] I stopped focusing on men and dating and chasing after the dream, the white picket … [Continue reading...]

A wedding doth not a marriage make

William and Kate

Generally, I don't like to interrupt a guest's series but I have to... I need to vent ... As I was writing Antonia's Culture of Marriage post, I could hear the T.V. in our living room with some program about the wedding ... The Royal Wedding ... The media's gone crazy. It's not just about THE DAY but many channels have declared it Royal Wedding week arguing that viewers are tired of news … [Continue reading...]

A Culture of Marriage

A Matchmaker

In my last post about author Antonia Ragozzini, she shared how after two marriages and dating in-between, she realized that there wasn't anything wrong with her, she was choosing the wrong men. She needed a fresh start, she needed to start by loving herself. I asked Antonia if our culture of marriage and the way she was raised played into that. Here's what she … [Continue reading...]

Choosing the wrong men

trash bins

In her book, Taking Out The Trash, author Antonia Ragozzino uses the weekly chore of taking out the trash bins as a metaphor for saying goodbye to the men in her life. With one mismatched date after another, Antonia started to wonder what was wrong with her. Why did she keeping picking the wrong man? Then she found her answer. Here's Antonia: [contemplate1] I always ended up picking men who … [Continue reading...]

When Your Husband Does Drugs

Men's Softball

My current guest is Antonia Ragozzino , author of Taking Out The Trash, a fictional tale based on Antonia's journey after divorce. Antonia is thirty-nine years old now and since the age of twenty-four she's been married twice and divorced twice. Both her husbands became drug users. Here's Antonia: I had lived such a sheltered life, I had never even seen drugs before. So I was clueless for two … [Continue reading...]